


Retrograde

by triggerlil



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern: No Powers, Alternate Universe - Muggle, Angst, Exes, F/F, Possibly Unrequited Love, Screenplay/Script Format, Unrequited Love, Wakes & Funerals, minor infidelity, reunited, reunited exes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-04
Updated: 2020-11-04
Packaged: 2021-03-09 05:00:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 950
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27379114
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/triggerlil/pseuds/triggerlil
Summary: When Hermione first met Pansy, it was like every broken piece of her heart was slotted back into place, the world just seemed a little less terrible.Hermione and Pansy fall in love, but Pansy falls out of it, and Hermione doesn't.
Relationships: Hermione Granger/Pansy Parkinson, Pansy Parkinson/Ginny Weasley, past Hermione Granger/Pansy Parkinson - Relationship
Comments: 18
Kudos: 37





	Retrograde

##### INT. KITCHEN - NIGHT

Hermione stands over the sink washing dishes, slowly working through the piles that surround her. She's wearing all black, from her dress to shoes, and her posture, although rigid, is defeated, like she's trying and failing to stay afloat.

Everything is quiet except for the lull of scrubbing and water. The lights are on, but the atmosphere is sombre, the world beyond the windows black.

There's the soft CLICK of a door. Hermione turns around, a dripping glass still in hand. 

PANSY (early 30s, same age as Hermione, sharp angles) is leaning against the door frame, just looking at her. She's also wearing all black, but looks much more put together.

There's a beat where they do nothing but take the other in, then—

HERMIONE

It's fine you know, you can go.

A pause, neither sure what they should do—let things remain as they were, or soldier forward.

After a moment, Pansy sighs, going over to turn on the old radio on the counter. It's something sultry, but also has depth and maybe a little hidden vulnerability (think Lana Del Rey's Norman Fucking Rockwell).

PANSY

It's been a while. 

Hermione turns around to continue washing.

PANSY

And I'm not just going to leave.

Hermione tenses up at the admission, shoulders trembling. Pansy walks over, both too close and not close enough.

PANSY

Let me help. You shouldn't be doing this.

HERMIONE

It's fine.

Pansy reaches for a tea towel and begins drying the wet dishes that Hermione has been piling precariously onto the dish rack.

PANSY

It's not fine. You know it's okay to let people help sometimes.

Hermione is hesitant to accept, both the current offer and the statement, but she reluctantly hands over the glass.

HERMIONE

Thank you.

They work together in silence, their movements flowing into the other. They've made a good team in the past.

HERMIONE

I didn't expect you to come.

Pansy's face falls.

PANSY

Of course I'd come 'Mione.

The tenderness of her voice, and the use of Pansy's old nickname for her, makes Hermione drop her dish into the sudsy water. The CLASH echoes throughout the kitchen. Both Pansy and Hermione stand there as if they're not sure what they were doing in the first place.

PANSY (cont'd)

You deserve to have someone here for you right now.

HERMIONE

And I appreciate that.

(beat)

I just wish you were someone else.

Pansy can't respond to that. If it were her, she'd say the same thing.

HERMIONE

I'm sorry.

PANSY

It's... Okay. I know what you mean.

The tension between them rises in time with the music. Hermione turns and touches Pansy lightly, like a question. Are they going to do this? They lean in to each other. 

In a surge of mixed grief and confidence, Hermione leans forward and kisses Pansy. For a moment, it's the same as it was in the past, when they were briefly in love, but then Pansy comes to her senses, gently pushing Hermione away.

HERMIONE

Pans—

PANSY

I'm engaged.

Shocked, Hermione backs away.

HERMIONE

Oh. 

PANSY

We met at a party. She's a football player, actually. Which was a bit funny since you know how I don't watch sports.

Hermione doesn't laugh (or find it funny). Somehow the fact that she's an athlete makes it so much worse.

HERMIONE

Oh... When did that happen?

PANSY

About six months after we split. I should... I should have told you sooner.

HERMIONE

It's okay.

PANSY

I didn't even mean for it to happen.

HERMIONE

Don't say that.

PANSY

Sorry, I'm sorry.

HERMIONE

What's her name?

PANSY

Ginny. Ginny Weasley.

HERMIONE

Did you propose?

PANSY

No. She did.

HERMIONE

And you just—You thought you'd just come here, and—?

PANSY

I'm sorry 'Mione, I should have made it clear.

Aching. Everything in Hermione is aching. She smiles and it aches; brittle and tired.

HERMIONE

It's fine.

She unplugs the sink, and they both watch as the water drains out loudly. Hermione turns her back to the counter.

HERMIONE 

I haven't been with anyone since us.

(beat)

I've barely looked at another woman since you.

PANSY

Oh, 'Mione.

HERMIONE

Stop calling me that. You're engaged, you don't get to call me that anymore. 

Pansy scrubs a hand over her face, not ready to accept defeat, but seeing that she might have made a mistake.

PANSY

Look, I'm sorry. I know you've been struggling and I guess I just wanted... I wanted to support you, I don't know. You still matter to me, Hermione. You'll always matter to me.

Hermione grimaces, her vulnerability making her frightened. Her fear making her angry.

HERMIONE

But not in the same way you matter to me.

PANSY

That's not fair.

HERMIONE

Isn't it? You show up here to—to "support me"? So you what, avoid me until the end of the service, let me kiss you, and surprise me with the joyous news of your recent engagement?

PANSY

I didn't mean for it to happen that way.

Hermione doesn't respond, just turns away, trying to hide her anger and disappointment. Pansy sighs, but doesn't want to push it. She's said what she wanted to say and now she can leave.

She heads for the door, and just as she's about to leave, turns, to take one last look at this wom

PANSY

I'm sorry about your mother.

A soft CLICK as she closes the door behind her. 

Hermione faces the radio that Pansy turned on and tries to keep her emotions in check—arms wrapped around herself—and there's the same sultry woman's voice, the same song signalling the departure of the only two people Hermione has ever loved.

FADE TO BLACK


End file.
